Every Day is Something New

Today I received my divorce papers... Nothing special. I knew it was coming. We went to court, we got divorced... Not that I am single either. I'm engaged to a wonderful man. However he has Asperger's. This is a very difficult disease. It's not contagious or curable. We live with it all the time, day in day out. His son has it too. The more I read the more I know but to live it is a totally different concept. Both can be moody, irrational, sweet, angry... Unemotional. Feelings don't come naturally. Crying is almost thought of as something you do when you are too mad to control your anger. Life can be rough some days. It is easier for them to be alone or immersed in a video game. Other days they want attention. And when they want attention they need to be the CENTER of my world... Throw in 1 child with Oppositional Defiance Disorder, 1 child with ADHD, a boyfriend and a 9 year old and wow... Some days can be overwhelming......... *sigh*

So I have this friend....

This morning on my way into work I had about a bazillion things going through my head. Now of course that I am actually sitting in front of a computer I can't seem to remember any of it. Typical. Of course that is what happens the instant you walk in the door at work. It's like a huge brain meltdown.

Don't you just hate it when you are talking to someone on the phone and they are kinda of having a conversation with you but really they are working or reading or texting or facebooking or twittering or... Well you get the point. The thing that irritates me is that people do it to me all the time (especially my sister) but then get mad when they call me at work and I do it to them. However, I start the conversation by saying, "I'm busy at work, what do you need?" You would think the word BUSY would make them realize that I will only half be paying attention and don't get pissed when I don't respond. Even MORE irritating is when they call me and then do it to me! Then sit there and talk to their computer or co-workers and mutter jibberish about whatever it is they are doing and when I say, "Excuse me?" they are like, "Oh no I was talking to my computer.". Although that statement right there lets you know the people I associate with are nuts :P Honestly though folks... Just call me when you aren't so busy!

So there is my tirade this morning. If I think of anything else to whine about I will certainly come back and post it.

Ok so 2 months later and I am back. Actually I forgot I had a blog here. (Not unusual for me...). So I finally get back and what do I realize? I hate the font I picked. Also how the hell do I change the background and such? Blogging is such a pain sometimes.

Well not really... I can't blame it on blogging. I never took the time to get to know the ways of the force... er this blog site. Although I still totally love that auto save feature. You have no idea how many really great long posts I lost over at that not so family friendly site to a crashed page. Argh! Oh and another thing... Can I blog whatever I want? Is this site family friendly? I guess I need to read up on the rules. Or can someone else tell me?

I tend to ramble when I have no where specific to go and this is definitely rambling. So far this morning has consisted of dirty talk in ye old english and a computer virus at work. Not much fun although it has kept me busy. I think the viruses, or would that be viri (as in octopus and octopi), are coming from myspace. That place seems to have turned into virus central. Every other day I have to deal with something from there.

Now I have forgotten where I was going with this... Damn. Another blog wasted to a brain fart.

Brain Dead

Lack of sun is making my brain die, soon I will be brain dead. Then I will be able to run for Congress. :P

I find it neat that this site saves all by itself. I used to have a horrible time with the last site I used. I was constantly losing all I had typed so I got into the habit of typing the whole blog up first, then editing and adding it onto the site and I still had problems some days.

Now for the original thought that even made me think to write a blog somewhere. I used to know a girl who always used large words in inappropriate ways. I think I committed the faux pas yesterday and she popped into my head. Off hand I can't remember any specific words she used but it was more the reason behind her doing it. She was trying to prove she was smart.

The truly funny thing about the whole situation is we worked for a house cleaning service. I mean come on... You don't have to be smart to know how to clean a toilet, so flaunting her intelligence was kind of silly. She wasn't all that good of a cleaner either so maybe she would have been better off not thinking she was so smart...

Ok so back to the word I used. It was PROVOCATION. According to Webster's there are a few similar definitions of this word.

• aggravation: unfriendly behavior that causes anger or resentment
• incitement: something that incites or provokes; a means of arousing or stirring to action
• needed encouragement; "the result was a provocation of vigorous investigation"

So now that I took the time to look it up I see I did use it right. Of course I was just showing off so it totally would have served me right if I had committed the ultimate faux pas and used my big word wrong while posting something on a Facebook page. Of course there is no way to spell check the crap you post on there and I am constantly going and deleting crap since I have spelled something worng.. errrr wrong I mean.

Now that brings up a new thought. Are you a spelling snob? I am. I live and die by spell check and dictionaries. Maybe it is the fact that I do office management, maybe it is because my sister spent years correcting my grammar at every turn. Either way I have a firm need for correct spelling. Too bad my cell phone lacks any spell check (another reason I want a freaking blackberry again) and now that I think about it... it lacks cut, copy and paste for texting and typing up emails. Hmmmmm...

Well I think that is enough brain emptying for today. I can't type too much or I may not have sufficient brain left over to function the rest of the day. :)

(Now I have to figure out how to add pictures and crap to this!)

Haven't done this for a while...

I used to blog all the time... Of course it was at a place where most people wouldn't be reading it, or really reading the bulk of what I was saying. Then there is also the issue that most of what I say is usually just my brain kind of leaking out of my head by way of my fingers. I don't pretend to be a writer, because I'm not. I am not trying to be cleaver or witty when I write. I just write. I write what I think, what I feel... So... yeah... basically I am whining.

Now if course since I haven't done this in a while I have to decide, how do I want to do this. Do I write one big column of streamed consciousness or do I write in tiny bursts of orderly paragraphs. I tend to be a paragraph person. Sometimes I think that is the organizer in me coming out. Each thought or idea contained in it's own little area. OK problem one solved.

Second item up for discussion. (Sad that I am having this discussion all by myself, to myself and with myself - even worse that it is in written format!) Spell check. See I didn't investigate close enough before starting item number two because I already solved it by simply looking at the actual icons up above. Would have been smart to do that first but hey, I do believe that I am not doing this to show off my supreme mental abilities. If that were the case I would be writing articles on the latest technological advances.

Third item. Choosing a font. Of course by the time anyone else sees it (if anyone sees it) I will have already chosen the font but this again is a conversation between me, myself and I so....

Font apparently says a lot about people. I even read an article and took some little quiz thing once that told me what type of font I was. Apparently I was IMPACT which as some people know is the preferred font of LOLCats. This may have come about because I am a bit of a facebook/twitter/myspace(not so much anymore)/need to have my info in the palm of my hands kinda gal. Truth is, I am a smart phone addict.

I currently own a G1. I can't wait to get my hands on the Blackberry Curve 8900. Of course everyone says that I will want my G1 back I don't know. This is a horrible dilemma for me. I so love real time browsing with my G1 but I miss the great email and IM features of the blackberry. I am so behind on emails that I have to devote a whole Saturday morning to them just to get through all the stuff I need to look at. OK so most of them are jokes and YouTube videos but still, gotta read and forward!

Totally got off subject. Font is going to be Courier. Kinda makes me feel like I am using a type writer. Not a word processor, but a real type writer. The kind with a ding at the end of each row. The smell of the ink ribbon, using real paper and that silly little zip sound it made when you were advancing to the next line... Here I am sounding all nostalgic about a type writer and I actually hardly ever used one. The first home computers were already out when I was young. We actually owned a "Candy". Not sure why it was called that. But she had silver paper that she spit out and pretty gold button.

So now you see where the idea that this is a place where a meandering mind wanders... I will try to remember to come back soon. Of course I have to figure out the optimal amounts of times to post (once a day, once a week, 5 times a day) so that people don't get the idea that I am a nut case, which I am btw... :)